More Memorable Videos of 2016, Sports And Otherwise

The end of the year lists continue, enjoy this 10 minute time-waster:

Chris Jones took a stumble at the end of his 40-yard run, mostly due to his dick falling out of his shorts:

Kevin Harlan’s play-by-play call on MNF when a moron runs on the field:

Blue Jays vs Rangers Fight:

Ana Navarro leads a chaotic discussion on CNN with Trump Supporters:

CNN’s Brooke Baldwin is speechless:

Central Michigan vs. Oklahoma State, game winning TD:

 

 

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Football Fan Fights Of 2016

As the year ends and we all reflect upon the ups, the downs, the itches, the scratches, the zigs and the zags, and the many, many drunken decisions we may have botched during past 365 days, one fact remains true EVERY single year; drunk football fans love to throw bows and knuckle up when they feel they’re shitty team has been disrespected.

With the help of the world wide interwebs, I’ve collected a few of the highlighted fan-fights from the past year.  Enjoy.

JAGS vs. BEARS (combined 6-24 records)

DOLPHINS vs 49ERS (Niners fans are so cute)

CHIEFS vs RAIDERS (sons even a mother couldn’t love)

MIAMI vs WEST VIRGINIA (College’s equivalent of RAIDERS vs CHIEFS)

sidenote: so many good things in this video, the WVU fan had a prosthetic leg……and the Miami fan gave him the “club punch”, punch and run!  Do you see the irony?

CARDINALS vs 49ers (seeing a theme here with SF fans?)

GIANTS vs EAGLES (Giants fan gets knocked out in front of his GF)

RAIDERS vs RAIDERS (is there anything MORE Raiders than this?)

 

 

 

It’s A Slow Day In Sports

Where The Fuck Are This Girl’s Legs?

Photo credit: Reddit

(originally posted on deadspin)

“The internet is going crazy over this insane optical illusion.” It’s the sentence that’s started a million blogs in the past and will continue to start a million blogs in the future—and for good reason. Because where the fuck are this girl’s legs?

As you can see, there are six girls, five sets of legs, at least two alcoholic beverages, and no one who appears to be 21.

After the issue was brought to our attention by Business Insider, the staff of Deadspin engaged in a heated debate that tested the very fabric of our already fraught and tenuous working relationships.

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Much to all of our chagrin, it appears that Samer was initially right. If you look closely, and as Reddit pointed out, you’ll notice that, all the way to the left, there are actually two sets of black pants that merely appear to be one. Messing with the photo a bit helps make that more readily apparent.

Still not convinced? Allow me to enhance:

Six sets of legs. Six girls. And yet, one question remains:

Some answers are not meant to be known.

Go Packers.

NFL Week 16: WTF Just Happened?

The NFL regular season is all but finished, with only the Wild Card spots left to be determined……..well, also seeding, general rankings, home field advantage and if Mike Tomlin will whoop Terrry Bradhsaw’s country-ass when he sees him this summer.  

The biggest news from the weekend:

  •  Buffalo said goodbye to the Rex Ryan Experiment, ending a reign of mediocre football sauteed in a Ryan Brothers whiskey sauce that even Patrick Hammer would be proud of.  (Now that’s what you call a sub-reference)
Rob & Rex Ryan at Easter

Rob & Rex Ryan at Easter

  • The Oakland Raiders woke up from the best dream any of them have had in 14 years, when Derek Carr broke in half.  There goes any Super Bowl hopes and dreams for 2016-17, Matt Mcgloin is NOT the guy, sorry to say.

 

  • The Playoff C.F. is C.F.-ed A.F. (so many teenager-abbreviations):

AFC

1. New England Patriots (13-2). The New York Jets weren’t even a speed bump on the Patriots’ road to the AFC playoffs. If they win or if the Raiders lose in Week 17, the Patriots will secure the No. 1 seed in the AFC field. The worst they can do is end up at No. 2.

2. Oakland Raiders (12-3). Oakland clinched its spot in Week 15. If the Raiders win at Denver or the Chiefs lose at San Diego in Week 17, the Raiders will be AFC West champions. Of course, the bigger issue right now for Oakland is that it is going to have to play its postseason games with Matt McGloin or Connor Cook at quarterback.

3. Pittsburgh Steelers (10-5). A brilliant Ben Roethlisberger comeback against the Ravens on Sunday night clinched the Steelers’ second division title in three years and eliminated Baltimore. Pittsburgh will host a playoff game on Jan. 7 or 8.

4. Houston Texans (9-6). When Cincinnati place-kicker Randy Bullock‘s attempt for a winning field goal sailed wide right on Saturday night, it made Houston champion of the AFC South for the second year in a row. The Texans’ Week 17 game in Nashville now has no relevance.

5. Kansas City Chiefs (11-4). The Chiefs can still claim the AFC West, but they need to beat San Diego in Week 17 and hope the Raiders lose in Denver.

6. Miami Dolphins (10-5). After a 1-4 start, the Dolphins have won nine of their past 10 games. And Miami clinched a playoff spot with Denver’s loss to Kansas City on Sunday night.

Surging: Miami’s regular-season finale on Sunday is at home against the Patriots. That meeting offers the Dolphins a chance to show themselves — and the Patriots — that they can play with New England. In Week 2 at Foxborough — before Miami’s offensive line came together and Jay Ajayi emerged — Jimmy Garoppolo, Jacoby Brissett and the Patriots built a 31-3 lead on the Dolphins and held on to win 31-24.

Slipping: Houston’s AFC South rivals had rough outings on Sunday. The Tennessee Titans lost their quarterback, lost a game to the 3-12 Jacksonville Jaguars and lost a potential playoff spot. The Indianapolis Colts were defeated in Oakland and eliminated from postseason contention even before Houston played. The Texans took care of their own business in an ugly game on Saturday night, but they already had received some help in the form of disappointing performances from the two teams behind them.

Worth noting: The Steelers are a perennial playoff team, but it hasn’t been easy. This is only the second time they’ve won their division since 2010. Their 2014 team was a division champion as well.

NFC

1. Dallas Cowboys (13-2). Dallas has everything wrapped up that can be wrapped up — a division title, a bye and home-field advantage throughout the NFC playoffs. When the Cowboys get back from Philadelphia on Sunday night, they won’t have to leave Texas again all season. (Super Bowl LI is in Houston.) The only question for the Cowboys is what to do about resting and/or protecting their players or keeping them fresh for January games.

2. Atlanta Falcons (10-5). With their win and the Buccaneers’ loss, the Falcons have clinched the NFC South. And thanks to Seattle’s loss, Atlanta has a chance to clinch the No. 2 seed in the conference and a first-round bye with a Week 17 home victory over the Saints.

3. Seattle Seahawks (9-5-1). They came all the way back and somehow still lost a home game to the Arizona Cardinals because of a missed extra point. Seattle is the NFC West champion, but it might have cost itself a chance at a first-round bye. As of now, the Seahawks would have to play three games (with at least one on the road) just to reach the Super Bowl.

4. Green Bay Packers (9-6). Green Bay is technically the NFC North leader at the moment. The Packers are tied with the Lions for first place but beat them head-to-head. The teams face off again in Week 17 at Detroit, and the winner will be division champ. The loser can still get in but would need help. Specifically, if the Packers lose, they would still be a wild-card team if Washington and the Buccaneers both lose. The Packers also could sneak in as a wild card if Washington loses and Green Bay clinches the strength-of-victory tiebreaker over Tampa. To do that, the Packers need any one of the following four teams to lose in Week 17: San Francisco, Tennessee, Indianapolis or Dallas. But the main point here is: win and the Packers are in as a division champ.

5. New York Giants (10-5). The Giants didn’t get it done on Thursday against the Eagles, but the Saints helped them out by beating the Buccaneers, which allowed the Giants to clinch a spot in the NFC field. The Giants are locked into the No. 5 seed no matter what. They cannot improve or weaken their seeding, and they will open the playoffs at the home field of whichever team finishes in the No. 4 spot.

6. Detroit Lions (9-6). This is the most fragile seeding in the whole picture. Having lost Monday night in Dallas, Detroit still has a chance to finish as NFC North champ and will do so if it beats Green Bay on Sunday night. If Detroit loses Sunday, the Lions would need a Washington loss to get them in as a wild card.

Surging: Washington might have cost itself a playoff berth with its home loss in Week 15 to the Carolina Panthers, but it rebounded nicely Saturday and still is in the race. If Washington beats the Giants on Sunday — assuming the Detroit-Green Bay tilt doesn’t end in a tie — Washington will get in as a wild-card team.

Slipping: The Tampa Bay Buccaneers aren’t eliminated, but a ton has to happen for them to get in. They need to win. They need Washington to tie. They need Green Bay to lose. And they need all four of the following teams to win their Week 17 games: San Francisco, Tennessee, Indianapolis and Dallas. Sounds like next year for Tampa.

Worth noting: The Minnesota Vikings (7-8) started the season 5-0 but were eliminated from playoff contention with Saturday’s loss in Green Bay. They traded their first-round pick to the Eagles for quarterback Sam Bradford after Teddy Bridgewater got hurt, and now they face an early and uncertain offseason.

  • The Cleveland Browns won a game, now they have to live up to expectations……hahahahahahah, wait, no.  A winning streak to end the season at 2-14 is the NFL equivalent of the “Tallest Midget” syndrome.

browns

 

NFL MVP Race is Under Way

-originally posted on ESPN-


Previous polls: Week 15 | Week 14 | Week 13


1. Tom Brady, QB | New England Patriots

Regular-season passing: 249-for-372 (66.9 percent); 3,064 yards; 22 TDS; 2 INTs; 80.6 Total QBR

Case for Brady: As long as you don’t mind the fact that he has played 10 games and the other candidates have played 14, Brady is your guy. His numbers projected over 16 games would end up at 4,902 yards, 35 touchdowns and three interceptions — and he’s 9-1.

Case against Brady: He has played only 10 games, and the other candidates have played 14.


T2. Derek Carr, QB | Oakland Raiders

Regular-season passing: 336-for-529 (63.5 percent); 3,705 yards; 25 TDs; 6 INTs; 60.8 Total QBR

Case for Carr: He is the quarterback of an 11-3 team that has made the playoffs for the first time in 14 years, and his fourth-quarter performances have been sterling. Carr fits what the Raiders seem to be: an upstart, gunslinger-type squad that’s fun to imagine as even better than it is right now.

Case against Carr: He’s middle-of-the pack in QBR and several other key stats, and he was 0-2 this year against the Chiefs, the Raiders’ closest AFC West competitors. Carr’s performance in those big games could end up costing him votes.


T2. Ezekiel Elliott, RB | Dallas Cowboys

Regular-season rushing: 310 carries; 1,551 yards; 13 TDs
Regular-season receiving: 31 receptions; 351 yards; 1 TD

Case for Elliott: The Cowboys’ offense is built around the run, and Elliott has 327 more rushing yards than any other player in the league. He just cut through one of the league’s hottest defenses to the tune of 159 rushing yards, and he stayed on the field for a few third downs and made a big catch or two in that game. To borrow a timely catchphrase, he’s the MVP candidate doing the most good.

Case against Elliott: Quarterbacks tend to win this award, so it’s an uphill battle for anyone who plays Elliott’s position, no matter how well he might be playing it. And there are some who feel (unjustifiably) that Elliott’s performance is more a reflection of his offensive line’s performance than of anything special about Elliott himself.


4. Matt Ryan, QB | Atlanta Falcons

Regular-season passing: 319-for-465 (68.6); 4,336 yards; 32 TDs; 7 INTs; 81.8 Total QBR

Case for Ryan: No one matches Ryan on the raw numbers. He leads in Total QBR, ranks second in yards, first in yards per attempt, second in touchdown passes and third in completion percentage. Counting only those who have played the whole season, Ryan has been the best quarterback in the league this year. And he has a team with a shaky defense sitting there at 9-5 and in first place.

Case against Ryan: That 9-5 record is nice, but it’s not the 12-2 or 11-3 that some of the other candidates are rocking. And in a race this good, that can be held against you. Ryan also has a star running back helping him out in Devonta Freeman, so maybe that’s it. But honestly, I can’t figure out why he’s so low on this list.


5. Aaron Rodgers, QB | Green Bay Packers

Regular-season passing: 346-for-533 (64.9); 3,781 yards; 32 TDs; 7 INTs; 75.5 Total QBR

Case for Rodgers: Even after his much-publicized rough start, Rodgers is fourth in the NFL in QBR for the season. He is completing 70.7 percent of his passes and averaging 8.29 yards per attempt, and he has seven touchdown passes and no interceptions during the Packers’ current four-game winning streak. He’s also working with a third-string running back and a shaky defense.

Case against Rodgers: The Packers are only 8-6, and while they’ll win the NFC North with wins in their final two games, it took them way too long to get into gear. Rodgers’ early-season performance drags down his overall numbers and, likely, his overall case in the eyes of voters.

Jon Ryan’s “Oh Shit” Moment In TNF

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The Red Sea parted last night on a fake punt for Seattle Seahawks’ Jon Ryan, but the sea was angry my friends…….the sea was angry that day.

Running like a convict escaping from Shawshank, the fleet-footed-Everyone’s Uncle-Trying -to-Relive Past Glories-of a football player disguised as a NFL punter lost control of the ball as he attempted to switch hands (no doubt seeing the looming defender).  Causing a chain reaction that disrupted his own space-time continuum, resulting in a crushing blow to the head, not only knocking him out cold but also sending a ripple effect throughout our current scewed timeline which I can only imagine has lead us to the Trumptopian Government we now have in front of us.

RIP Jon Ryan faking a punt ever again.  It’s even better in real time.

Craig Sager has Died

Craig Sager Has Died


Photo: Chris Pizzello/Invision/AP

TNT basketball sideline reporter Craig Sager has died. He was 65.

Sager had started treatments for leukemia in 2014. In March of this year, doctors gave him three to six months to live after the cancer was no longer in remission. Sager had planned to cover the Rio Olympics this summer, but had to skip them to undergo more treatments. In a deal with ESPN, he assumed duties with Shelley Smith in Game 6 between the Cleveland Cavaliers and Golden State Warriors, his first NBA Finals assignment.

Sager developed a comical rapport with San Antonio Spurs head coach Gregg Popovich, who was curt with everyone but eventually softened up towards the reporter, as well as his son, Craig Sager Jr. Sager didn’t want preferential treatment, however, as he told SI’s Richard Deitsch:

“Pop saying he wanted me back and then promising to be nice? I was like, Oh, my God, that’s unbelievable, what an honor,” said Sager. “But then I started thinking about it: If I come back and Pop starts being nice to me, it just wouldn’t be right. I want him to go Serbian on me.”

The Associated Press wrote about Sager’s third bone marrow treatment with stem cells in September, and the sideline reporter’s refusal to accept the bad odds dealt to him:

“Man, life is too beautiful, too wonderful, there’s just too many things,” he said. “It’s not just you. It’s your family and kids and all. Fight. Fight until the end. Fight as hard as you can.”

Even Coach Pop liked Craig Sager (click here).

How Is This NOT an American TV Game Show

“Janken” means paper-rock-scissors (“taikai” means “tournament”), and I’m surprised that the game usually reserved for determining who takes the trash out or who’s sober enough to drive home hasn’t reached our airwaves already.

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In Japan, “janken” dates from the 17th century and is an evolution of an older game that was imported from China that dates from 200 BC.  YES, the “age of warring states” around 200 BC during the HAN Empire in what is now China may or may not (probably not, but who cares, this is funny) have been determined by Ro-Sham-Bo.  As the competition between states increased, armies grew larger, with professional generals commanding massed ranks of infantry and cavalry. To maintain these armies and run their states efficiently, well-organized bureaucracies emerged, staffed by highly educated officials and professional rock-paper-scissor-warriors with a zest for blood (probably).

Japan, however, is often credited with helping rock-paper-scissors spread through the West……thank you Japan.

Call Ryan Seacrest, I’ve got a killer new gameshow for him to host.