The official – mildly educated in soccer – 2018 World Cup preview

The 2018 World Cup is upon us and if you’re anything like me, there’s only a few certainties that you’re hangin your hat on as far as general information:

  1. The US Men’s team isn’t in it, because apparently despite growing the world’s most incredible athletes right here in our own back yard, we can’t seem to be remotely competitive when it comes to soccer.
  2. Argentina’s Lionel Messi is still the best player in the world.
  3. Christiano Ronaldo is still playing? And I’m assuming still the male-model version of a socer player?
  4. Neymar…he’s the stud from Brazil with only one name – a name pronounced the way a drunk kid from Baltimore who’s attempting a Southie-Boston accent would sound: “Naaaaaaaymaaaaaaahhhhhhhrrrrr”
  5. The 2018 World Cup is in Russia, so prepare for tons of political infused sports commentary from our “elected” president.

As a reference point, here’s what else you should know about the 2018 World Cup, just in case you happen to stumble into a bar where people are watching and you don’t want to sound like a moron:

Top 10 players in the world